Stuck on You

Directed by Peter and Bobby Farrelly

Opens nationwide 12/12/2003

As the humor of writer-directors Bobby and Peter Farrelly, best known for There’s Something About Mary, becomes less based on bodily functions and more an outgrowth of their narrative, it is only reasonable that the number of yucks (as well as yecchs) per hour should drop. But as on view most recently with their latest, Stuck on You, the Farrelly Brothers can still make some pretty enjoyable movies. So why do I miss the old guys?

The set-up for the movie would seem to be OK for the Farrelly Brothers (or with a different slant David Cronenberg). Bob and Walt Tanner are conjoined twins living in Martha’s Vineyard. Walt (Greg Kinnear) is outgoing and an aspiring actor (we see his community theater version of Tru dragging his brother around). Bob (Matt Damon) is the athlete, shy, but affable and afflicted with stage-fright to the point of hyper-ventilating prior to Bob’s stage work. But even though blue collar Bob is content to work behind the grill of their beanery, Quickie Burger (your order in three minutes or it is free), Walt aspires to bigger things and convinces Bob they have to go to LA so that he can fulfill his lifelong dream of being a real actor. Although different personalities linked by a single liver and a skin bridge, the brothers are dedicated to each other and their boyhood pledge of never standing in the way of the other brother’s dreams. So its off to Los Angeles they go with the potential side-benefit of Bob finally being able to meet his internet gal pal.

The one agent who will talk to them (Seymour Cassel) confides that Siamese twins may not be the easiest sell, but luckily as Bob quickly points out, they are “not Siamese—we’re American” and soon Walt is cast opposite Cher on TV’s hottest new detective show. Cher (perfectly cast as herself—and you really cannot see anyone else in the role—except maybe Meryl Streep, but she is busy playing herself) seems to have an extraordinarily good sense of humor about herself. And whether it is real, computer animation, Vaseline on the lens, or whether repeated plastic surgery has made actual human aging impossible, Cher looks younger than her two co-stars.

While there are some echoes of the gang that brought us Kingpin and Dumb and Dumber, the new sensitive Farrelly Brothers (exhibited here and in Shallow Hal) seem most interested in getting screen time for an immense cast replete with Farrelly friends (now SAG-eligible), slumming sports stars, and a variety of mentally and physically challenged actors. Are the Farrellys trying to store up Karmic points or is this some kind of atonement for the way they have always made fun of people’s physical and mental shortcomings. I, and the multitudes that have always supported their efforts, do not want sensitive FB movies—we want our poop jokes back.

My inability to accept the newfound sensibilities of the FBs aside, they are still capable of making a funny movie with some enjoyable bits and a lot of sly jokes. I just miss the wall-to-wall jokes of the old days. Movie audiences need our gross-out artists to remain as immature as us.

–Bill Henry

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